Removing Peer Pressure and Finding Your Inner Confidence

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Abuachi Eberechukwu

Problems faced by young adults in this era is the issue of peer pressure they get from mates or individuals around them. 

   Peer pressure is being forced to do what you don’t want to do or you want to do because others are doing it or you are forced emotionally to do it. A lot of young adults told according to research, have found themselves doing illegal activities or committing crimes because they were being forced or rather they were being pressured to do so which later developed into something that serious. It is that urge to do something that has been the main concern. Sometimes young individuals go to the extend of pretending to be what they are not all because they want to show off just like their friends are.

              It’s something of great concern, this is a spirit and it has been causing a lot of harm to the life of this young adults and if not properly addressed, they end up feeling unworthy of themselves. According to research, we have discovered some few causes of this peer pressure problem which we will be looking at here. First  cause is the Lack Of Confidence in an individual; when an individual or young adults loses their confidence, they tend to find where they could raise that confidence in them but then they end up in the wrong dimension another is fear of not being seen among individuals; This young adults of this era really want to be seen, their desire to be seen has driven them to making wrong decisions or taking the wrong path. They are willing and ready to do just anything just to be seen. Another is The desire to fit in can cause young adults to do things just because they don’t want to be left out. Another is caused by low self esteem; and that is why I always advise people who I mentor to work on their self esteem, when you feel so low of yourself, you tend to seek unnecessary attention or pressure and then you end up joining the wrong group. Some is caused by the lack of courage to speak up and as a result, they end up being in a dangerous peer group that would lead them to another dimension of trouble or courage that could cause them more harm than ever.

 Youths this days, are being ridiculed by outsiders, which had led some of them to take such decisions. When this young adults join such peers, it becomes difficult for them to come out of it. I know you must be wonderful how or why such is happening but have you tried to know why they join these peers. Well the causes listed and explained above should be enough to explain why. 

   Now let’s ask ourselves, how did it happen, how did these young adults enter into such mess? Let’s be frank about it, some of this young adults find themselves or are in such mess unknowingly or the knew, other way around, or it Cou be because others are doing it, let me also do it, or that if I don’t do it, they won’t accept me, or maybe they see their fellow lady dressing indecent and then they desire to dress indecent because they want to be like them. Sometimes it can even be a risky challenge that was placed down by someone outside but because they have seen others do it, they themselves end up doing it, causing harm to their self. That’s just how peer pressure comes in and so if you seeing yourself in such, don’t worry I will be sharing with you how you can rebuke it or how you can turn down that urge. Now let’s ask ourselves me share with you few instances of what happens if it escalates or if not kept locked it’s cage. 

 This peer pressure things tends to get really set if left unchecked. Like a case whereby some group of boys dared a boy into stealing, and the boy wanted to prove to the other boys that he could do it even when he couldn’t but because he was pressured into it, he had to steal. That’s just how was the beginning of the boy’s problem; he started stealing from that day, he got caught and his name entered into the criminals records, he was even locked behind bars when he was caught. Let me share with you another case of a girl who was being forced to have a sexual relationship because her friends were all into it and because she wanted to feel among, she went into it, she got pregnant, she dropped out of school, she even faced humiliation from family members and friends, not just that, she entangled herself in a web of transmitted infections that she couldn’t come out of. It was really painful. Why am I sharing these, because I want you to realize the effects of what peer pressure can cause in the life of an individual or a person and how dangerous it can be if you do not walk out of it. . Back to my solutions which I will be sharing, let’s have them now;

1. Learn to say NO with confidence and not fear; learn to master the heart of confidence, be bold, tell them straight to their faces that you not interested in whatever it is they are telling you to do.

2. Stay away from those places where such peers hang around. Especially in school, stay away from those places . Instead be in places where you know that they won’t hang around.

3. Be SMART and use the delay tactics like; I will think about it, or give me time to rephrase on it. Here you need to apply wisdom, think on how it can affect your life negatively or positively and know how you can take preventive measures.

4. Learn to surround yourself with positive and like minded intentional friends who respect your choices and who you are.

5. Stay true to the values you were taught, remind yourself of the long term goals you have set for yourself and if you don’t have, set yours now and work towards it instead of looking for friendship that won’t help you.

 Trust in the Lord with all your heart always.

             Writer

Abuachi Grace Eberechukwu

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