Tag Archive for: evangelist

A Farewell Bathed in Roses & Predictions: The Supernatural Death of Kathryn Kuhlman

On February 20th, 1976, a hush fell over the 800-bed hospital as the lights flickered out. Moments earlier, Kathryn Kuhlman, a renowned evangelist, had passed away. While her declining health suggested an irregular heartbeat leading to a flatline, her heart inexplicably stopped, leaving everyone stunned.

A stark contrast to the fading life outside, Kathryn's body emanated a warmth that surprised the new, unbelieving nurse tending to her. But the true wonder unfolded next. The air, thick with the fragrance of millions of roses, enveloped not just the room but the entire floor. No roses were present, yet the heavenly scent bloomed from within.

The aroma's journey didn't stop there. It permeated the entire hospital, defying the sterility of medical floors and wafting across the street into the adjoining building. Nurses and patients alike were left in awe, unable to explain the fragrance's origin.

As the head nurse arrived to record the official time of death, 1:13 am, she reprimanded the new nurse for allowing roses on the ICU floor, unaware of the invisible bouquet filling the air. The scent wasn't confined to one room or floor; it had miraculously claimed four stories of the hospital and stretched beyond, leaving no doubt about its source.

Back in Kathryn's room, the new nurse, overwhelmed by the tangible presence of the Holy Spirit, struggled to stand. The weight of glory, as she described it, was palpable. Later, checking the previous nurse's notes, they found a chilling revelation: Kathryn's final words and a request scribbled in haste.

“I shall die on February 20th at 1:13 am. Please have only roses at my funeral.”

Deeply moved, the young nurse, once skeptical, found herself overcome with tears. In that moment, she experienced a profound shift, touched by the undeniable presence of the Holy Spirit.

Kathryn Kuhlman's passing wasn't a somber farewell, but a glorious departure. Her legacy, intertwined with the fragrance of roses, continues to inspire even today, a testament to the extraordinary power of faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and the mysteries that lie beyond our understanding.

Full testimony video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vEjjJK8q388&t

God bless you
Tony Francis

The Importance of Faith In the Life of the Christian Believer

“For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith” (1 John 5:4).

What Is Faith?
Faith is a strong feeling of trust in someone or something
For the Christian believer, faith is belief and trust in one God
According to Hebrews 11:1 “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen”

Faith is so critical and important in our lives, as Christians, that it occurs or mentioned 100 times in the Bible – 28 times in the Old Testament and 72 times in the New Testament.

“By faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that the things which are seen were not made of things which are visible” (Hebrews 11:3).
The world or creation itself was founded in faith when God made the following decrees;
• “Let there be light” – (Genesis 1:3)
• “Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters and let divide the waters from the waters” – (Genesis 1:6)
• “Let the waters under the heavens be gathered unto one place, and let the dry land appear” – (Genesis 1:9)
• “Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb that yields seed, and the fruit tree that yield fruit according to its kind” – (Genesis 1:11)
• The decree continues until the creation of man when God said “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth” –(Genesis 1:26)

Faith is very crucial in the life of the Christian believer for the following reasons:

1) As Christian Believers, We Live By Faith
Romans 1:17 says “For therein is the righteousness of God revealed from faith to faith: as it is written: the just shall live by faith”.

Also in Galatians 2:20 Apostle Paul tells us that “I am crucified with Christ, nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me”.

Our relationship with God through Jesus Christ, His Son, has been made right. God declared us to be righteous because of our faith in Christ “from faith to faith”
By faithfully trusting in God by our belief in Christ, we are saved and find life not only in this world but eternally.

2) As Christian Believers, We Are Firm In The Faith
Romans 11:20 says “Well; because of unbelief they were broken off, and thou standest by faith. Be not high minded but fear”.
2 Corinthians 1:24 puts it thus, “Not for that we have dominion over your faith, but are helpers of your joy, for by faith ye stand”.

Due to faithlessness, the Jews who are the natural branches of the tree were broken off. The Gentile believers have been grafted into the tree like a wild olive shoot. Both the Jews and Gentiles now share the tree’s nourishment based on faith in God. No one can rest on heritage or culture for salvation. The Gentiles should not feel superior to the Jews because if God had not rejected the Jews, as it were, the Gentiles probably would not have had a chance.

3) As Christian Believers, We Combat The Good Fight
1 Timothy 6:12 says “Fight the good fight of faith, lay hold on eternal life, whereunto thou art also called and has professed good profession before many witnesses”.

As Christian believers, we must have an active faith, obeying God with courage and doing what we know is right.
It is time for action on your part. What are you waiting for? – Get going, don’t wait!

4) As Christian Believers, We Walk By Faith
2 Corinthians 5:7 says “For we walk by Faith, not by sight”.

5) As Christian Believers, We Win By Faith
In 1 John 5:4 where we took our text, we are told that we can overcome whatever challenge life throws on our way, as long as we have faith and trust in God.
It says “For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith”.

6) As Christian Believers, We Are Justified By Faith
Romans 5:1 puts it thus, “Therefore, being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ”.

Peace with God means that we have been reconciled with Him. There is no more hostility between us and God, no sin blocking our relationship with Him. Peace with God is made possible by Jesus paying the price for our sins through His death on the cross.

7) As Christian Believers, We Please God By Faith
Hebrews 11:6 tells us that “But without faith it is impossible to please Him; for he that cometh to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him”.

God wants us to have a personal dynamic relationship with Him, and not just a mere knowledge of His existence. After all the demons and witches know that God exists, that does not stop them from doing evil. Those who seek Him diligently will find that they have intimate relationship with Him. When you tell others about the gospel, please encourage them to be honest and diligent in their search for truth and faith in God.

8) As Christians Believers, We Grow In Faith
1 Thessalonian 1:3 says “Remembering without ceasing your work of faith, and labour of love, and patience of hope in our Lord Jesus Christ, in the sight of God, and our Father”.

Like the Thessalonians who stood firm in the face of persecution, Apostle Paul is admonishing us to also do the work of God produced by faith, labour prompted by love, and endurance inspired by hope. These characteristics are the hall marks of an effective Christian believer.

9) As Christian Believers. We Die In Faith
“These all died in faith, not having received the promise, but having seen them afar off, and were persuaded of them, and embraced them, and confessed that they were strangers, and pilgrims on the earth” (Hebrews 11:13).

This world is not our home and cannot live here forever. Many people, especially of the Old Testament, died without receiving all that God promised. However, a good number of them never lost their vision of heaven.
Many of us become frustrated, and defeated when our needs, wants or expectations, are not immediately met on giving our lives to Christ, and therefore want to quit. If you are one of such people, please be patient, take courage from heroes of faith who lived and died without seeing the fruit of their faith on earth and yet, continued to believe (Hebrews 11:36-39).

Some Heroes of Faith Who Did Not See The Fruit Of Their Faith On Earth
Abel and Enoch (Hebrews 11:4-5)
Noah and Abraham (Hebrews 11:7-8)
Sarah and Isaac (Hebrews 11:11, 20)
Jacob and Joseph (Hebrews 11:21-22)
Moses and Rahab (Hebrews 11:23,31)
Boaz (Ruth 2:15-16)

Some Heroes of Faith Who Persevered And Saw The Fruit Of Faith

Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, David, Samuel, the Prophets (Hebrews 11:32-33)

How To Grow In Faith Through Jesus Christ
“That we henceforth be no children, tossed to and fro , and caused about with every wind of doctrine, by the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive” (Ephesians 4:14).
1) Growing In Faith Begins With The New Birth Through The Word Of God
1 Peter 2:2 says “As new born babes, desire the sincere milk of the word, that ye may grow thereby”.

One thing common to all children is that they want to grow up – like their big brothers and sisters or their parents. Similarly, when we are born again, we become spiritual new babies, if healthy, we will yearn to grow. The need for milk is a natural instinct for a baby, and it signals the desire for nourishment that will lead to growth. In the same way, since we see the need for God’s word and begin to find nourishment with Christ, our spiritual appetite will increase and we will start to mature. How strong is your desire for God’s word?

2) As Children, We are Fed With Milk
“For everyone that useth milk is unskillful in the word of righteousness: for he is a babe” (Hebrews 5:13)

Commitment to Christ moves people out of their comfort zones or positions. You cannot grow as a Christian if you remain in the same position instead of applying what you have learned to your situation and teaching others. As a new born Christian, stop your old ways of doing things, fellowship with the brethren and imbibe the new culture in Christ. In this way, you will be able to understand the high-priestly role of Christ.

3) As Adults, We Are Fed With Solid Food
“But strong meat belongeth to them that are of full age, even those by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil” (Hebrews 5:14).

Your spiritual growth determines your capacity to feast on deeper knowledge of God (solid food). More often than not, we want God;s banquet before we are spiritually capable of digesting it. As we grow in the Lord and put into practice what we have learned, our capacity to understand will also grow.

4) Many Remain Eternal Christians
Hebrews 5:12-14 tells us “Wherefore lift up the hands which hang down and the feeble knees; And make straight paths for your feet, lest that which is lame be turned out of the way, but let it rather be healed. Follow peace with all men and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord”.

In order for us to grow from baby Christians to adult or mature Christians, we must learn discernment. We must train our consciences, minds, senses and our bodies to distinguish between good and evil. Can you recognise temptation before you? Can you tell the difference between correct text of Scripture and a mistaken one?

5) We Should All Grow And Become Adults
Ephesians 4:13-14 admonishes us to walk in unity.
Working together, the church can express the fullness of Christ – Ephesians 3:19
Christ is the Truth – John 14:6
The Holy Spirit who guides the church is the Spirit of Truth – John 16:13
Satan, by contrast, is the father of lies – John 8:44

As followers of Christ, we must be committed to the truth. This means that our words should be honest and our actions should reflect Christ’s integrity as well. We should realise that speaking the truth in love is not always easy, convenient or pleasant. However, this is very necessary if the church is going to do Christ’s work on earth. Remember that YOU are the church.

6) The Lord Looks After Our Growth
Ephesians 4:11-13 says “And He gave some Apostles, and some Prophets, and some Evangelists, and some Pastors, and some Teachers. For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ: Till we all come in the unity of faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, unto a perfect man, unto the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ”.

The Holy Spirit has given every Christian a special gift for building up the church. Now that we have these gifts, it is imperative we use them. If you know what your gifts are, please look fo opportunity to serve the Lord and use them. If you do not know, ask God to show you, perhaps with the help of your Pastor or other Christian friends. The enormous responsibility the church has includes preaching, teaching, evangelising, healing, giving, nurturing, administering, building, etc. God has called us as members of His body to perform this responsibility. Together we can obey God more fully than anyone alone. Working together, in unity, the church can express the fullness of Christ (Ephesians 3:19).

7) The Word Is The Best Way Of Generating Our Growth In Faith
Acts 20:32 puts it this way “And now, brethren, I commend you to God, and to the Word of His grace, which is able to build you up, and to give you an inheritance among all them which are sanctified”.

Like he prayed for the Ephesians in this passage, Apostle Paul is also praying for and commending you and I to God and His Word that the more we know Christ (our model), through the word, the more we will be like Christ. Study Jesus in the Gospel to see what He was like on earth. Personal knowledge of Christ through the Word will greatly change our lives. How much of His Word do you know? How much of Him are you willing to learn?

Until you invite Jesus Christ into your life (being born again) God’s continued presence can never abide with you. Today, accept Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Saviour. Ask Him to have mercy on you and forgive your sins and become the Master and Ruler of your soul, henceforth.
If you have backslid, retrace your steps back to Him right now and rededicate your life to God. However, if you have a living relationship with God, then tell others about Him – how much He loves us, He is our Savior, Redeemer and He died for our sins in order that we might not have to face the punishment that we rightly deserve. He is coming back the second time to take with Him all those who believe and accept Him, by faith, into their lives to live with Him eternally.
Congratulations if you have just accepted Jesus Christ into your life. Now look for a Bible believing church in your neighborhood to attend and you will be taught and grow in the Word of God.

God Bless You.       

#PathofLife

End of Days – A Classic By Kathryn Kuhlman

End of Days – A Classic By Kathryn Kuhlman
End of Days – A Classic By Kathryn Kuhlman

What does the bible teach about the end of days? In this short heart-to-heart talk, healing evangelist Kathryn Kuhlman unlocks the scriptures for us because the day of the Lord Jesus Christ is at hand. Listen with hope, respond, and share with your friends.

Prophetic Word for the month of Kislev 5783 / December 2022

Every time I position myself to pray and hear from the Holy Spirit for each month (Hebraic and Gregorian) I get so excited and joyful. It is so powerful to make Jesus the Lord over our time and new beginnings. Two are at the door, the King of Glory and the enemy and when we consecrate ourselves and time for Yeshua, he comes and reigns and the rest is history! Surely goodness and mercy follow you every single day. I encourage you to make it your holy habit and discipline to download God's agenda, align with Heaven and pray for your times and seasons. God wants time to be your servant and not your enemy, he doesn't want you to war with time. If you want to learn more about that, you can read my post “I know My Plans For You”.

Now let's read and hear by faith what God is revealing to us about this month. Are you ready?

The Lord says this month you will feel a difference in your church meetings wherever you do them. My anointing will be present in stronger ways and levels like never before. The reason I am increasing my anointing in your church meetings and gatherings is that many are coming and they need MY deliverance. Entertaining sermons will not help them, they are after the real deal, they want to SEE ME, says the Spirit of the Lord.

It is so important as servants and ministers of the Gospel to prepare for this new level of anointing. Yes God is releasing the anointing in stronger measures BUT as a carrier and a vessel you need to steward it, less the pure will be mixed when coming out of your heart and character pipelines. God wants JESUS and JESUS only to be seen, in a pure form. Humility is key because it is not your power and skills that are changing people's lives but his power and might. Don't lose your mind, you are just a vessel and HE is the treasure.

Prepare yourself well behind the scenes, in deep prayers, in the fire of God, and let Jesus shines through you! It shall be an ever-increasing anointing in Jesus' name.

People will come to see you BURN for the Lord. “I set myself on fire and people come to watch me burn.” John Wesley (John 1)

Jesus told Peter if you love me serve my people. What a precious moment in time to show your love for the Lord and serve his people powerfully. One day you will enjoy the rewards in Heaven! I feel God's excitement this month because he is about to encounter many and show them his SAVING love which goes beyond words. It is power and tangible glory, it is a dark heart turning to the light, it is crossing from death to life, it is BONDING with the Son of the living God. You play an important role in all that and for that, we thank God for you! Halleluiah

If you have a church, if you lead meetings anywhere, feel free to comment below so the readers of this blog can lift you in their prayers. Let God anoint you! I end with those amazing words in the book of Ruth 3:3, wash before the anointing “Therefore wash yourself and anoint yourself, put on your best garment and go down to the threshing floor; but do not make yourself known to the man until he has finished eating and drinking.” Amen

Tony Francis

Feel free to sow the beginning of this month to support this ministry, especially during this Christmas season. Your sowing helps us be a LIGHT to the world. Thank you for your generous donations. We pray over your seed and bless it in Jesus' name. I decree and declare that as you sow this month, your children will experience eternal salvation and will be powerful ministers to the Lord, evangelists waiting to be birthed in Jesus' name. I also sense that as you bless the work of the Lord in your sowing, you will usher into a breakthrough in your health and healing. I am believing for you that you will start a new beginning in your health, stronger than ever. God bless you! Make a Donation Now

Kathryn Kuhlman: The Greatest Power in the World eBook

No woman in the 20th century demonstrated the restoring and healing power of the holy spirit to more people than Kathryn Kuhlman. She lived what she believed, and what she believed she proclaimed with boldness. “No man or woman need ever be defeated! You are only defeated when you consent to defeat”. To non-Christians sickened with their sins, she offered salvation through Jesus Christ as the first step to an undefeated life. To Christians struggling to overcome spiritual, emotional, and physical obstacles in their lives, she offered hope and courage and pointed them unerringly to the source of power they needed to live undefeated lives: The Holy Spirit.

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Request Prophecy, My Heavenly Calendar, Dream Interpretation & 101 Prophetic Activation

Request a personal prophetic word from the Lord by email or WhatsApp. The Now Word, The Month Word, the Friend Word, the Couple Word, the Yearly Word, Your Heavenly Calendar, Dream Interpretation & 101 Mini Activation and Mentoring. Read our encouraging testimonies how people are blessed after receiving this ministry. Learn more about this and get yours today!

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Kathryn Kuhlman: The Greatest Power in the World Free Audiobook

As you listen to this audiobook, you will learn how to receive the Holy Spirit's phenomenal power in your own life, and as a result, your life will be changed forever. Instead of feeling defeated, you will experience joyful victory in every area of your life. As you learn what Ms. Kuhlman knew on a personal basis, you will be filled with the power of the Holy Spirit—the greatest power in the world.

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Where is the Power of God Today?

If Jesus Christ was your pastor, would He hire interpreters for the deaf in His church?   If blind people came to His church, would they leave blind? If those with cancer came to His services, would they still leave with cancer? The church preaches about Christ every week, they preach about His great power, they preach about His great love, they preach about His ability to heal sickness and disease. So where is this great power in the church today? Why are we not seeing great signs and wonders by His followers like the early church did? Do you ever ask yourself these questions? I certainly do.

I believe the reason we are not seeing these great exploits among the majority of believers today is because the majority of believers today are carnal, not spiritual. (1Corinthians 3:1) They are babes in Christ. They have allowed themselves to become so entangled by the cares of this world that they have become unfruitful and powerless. “And these are they which are sown among thorns, such as hear the Word, but the cares of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches, and the lusts of other things entering in, choke the Word, and it becomes unfruitful.” (Mark 4;19)

Now I realize that we all must go through maturing stages in our Christian walk, and to be carnal at some point is natural, but for 20 years or longer? We have those in the body of Christ that have been saved for decades and yet are still babes in Christ. They are simply too lazy or too busy to study their bibles and renew their minds with the Word of God. They never grow spiritually and as a result, have become defeated and ignorant of the authority Christ has given us as believers. Another reason is that many churches are stuck in man-made traditions which quench the Holy Spirit and His power. Still others simply do not believe that the supernatural gifts are operating in the new testament church today. They do not understand spiritual warfare, how to use the authority God has given us in the name of Christ to combat demonic forces that are running rampant in the lives of our loved ones and people throughout our world.

Whatever the reason, this type of carnality and ignorance of God's Word will cause us not to walk in the fullness of the power and authority that He intended. I am thoroughly convinced that the Lord has once again become weary concerning the condition of His church and has issued a change coming. Jesus tells us in the book of Mark, “these signs shall follow them that believe, they shall lay hands on the sick and they shall recover.” (Mark 16:17,18) Do you see this happening on a regular basis in the church? I certainly don't. Although I do believe we are about to see the return of great signs and wonders to the church that will play a major part in evangelism in these last days.

If we look back at the evangelistic methods of Christ Himself and the early church, we see where they raised the dead, healed sickness and disease, opened the eyes of the blind, “and many believed.” (Acts 9:40-42) Signs and wonders are to shew forth the power and glory of God, and they were meant to be part of evangelism to bring people into the Kingdom. God isn't just showing off, and our focus isn't to be on signs and wonders, but on the saving of souls. For the last several decades God has been preparing a generation of believers behind the scenes. He's raising up an army of believers who will refuse to compromise their faith, who seek not money or fame, who walk in a power and a boldness unlike anything we have seen in a very long time. They are the ones who will be leading the way in the coming days. So where is the power of God in the church? It's coming, and when it begins to spread throughout this earth like wildfire, there will be no mistaking it.

Jeff Allen

Mentoring

Jesus said to Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you burn with love for me more than these?” Peter answered, “Yes, Lord! You know that I have great affection for you!” “Then take care of my lambs,” Jesus said.

Knowledge puffs up while love builds up! Knowledge is important to feed the sheep, the followers of Christ, and the apostle Paul commanded his spiritual son pastor Timothy to study the word of God very close to show himself approved. But I believe love is the cornerstone for mentoring and pastoring. 

Jesus didn’t request from Peter to have knowledge first to feed his sheep, rather he was establishing the true heart behind it, neither did the Lord ask Peter, the apostle, and pastor to be if he loves his sheep, interesting right? Jesus asked Peter if he loves the owner of the sheep!

Loving the Lord is your authoritative license to feed his sheep. Why? Maybe because the sheep bite and at some point, you can throw the towel and leave and Moses is a good example of this struggle. Loving the Lord is ETERNAL and will keep you standing your ground to give him the rewards of his suffering. Doesn’t look bad if Jesus saved us, his precious souls, but couldn’t keep and nurture us after that glorious salvation? As much as the Lord wants to save you, he wants to build you up. As much as God needs evangelists, he desperately needs pastors and mentors. God always looks after the whole process and you have a part to fit. 

“The LORD used a prophet to bring Israel up from Egypt, by a prophet he cared for him.” Hosea 12:13 (Salvation & Caring)

Today, Holy Spirit is releasing his oil/anointing for you to mentor others in the things of the Lord and to make the King known to them. Having life coaching certificates, and prophetic degrees, and training, is all good and needed, go for it, invest as much as you can in this direction, BUT DO YOU LOVE THE LORD? … Feed his sheep.

Tony Francis

Dreams of Comfort for the Brokenhearted

By Cheryl Shepherd

Have you ever received a dream that you knew was from God for the purpose of providing comfort during a particularly desperate time? If you’re a skeptic, based on my studies in Psychology and Sociology,  I certainly would have agreed before my mind was changed by a very incredible dream.

I was recently reminded, while listening to a story told by evangelist Perry Stone, of how drastically my mind was changed.

Perry spoke of a dream he had about a child that he and his wife had lost lost due to a miscarriage and that reminded me of my own similar experience. In his dream he had a very vivid picture of this precious little girl waiting to meet him in heaven.

What was especially touching about this story was the fact that years later, he came across someone who had painted a picture of this beautiful little girl, matching the little girl in his dream in complete detail down to the ragged stuffed animal she clung to! There were many more facets of the story that were certainly miraculous and reminded me of a time that brought to life a scripture that has become very dear to me. Psalms 34:18 says, the Lord is near to the brokenhearted; He saves those crushed in spirit.

Twenty-one years ago I lost my son Billy’s identical twin brother Brandon, due to a rare condition called twin to twin transfusion syndrome.

While I can’t begin to imagine the grief experienced by a mother who has to say goodbye to a child at any age, the impact of this loss for me was a profound one in a different way, yet devastating just as any mother knows who has experienced never being able to meet or hold her unborn child.

At that time there was very little known about twin to twin transfusion syndrome or TTTS. It was explained to me that this was a rare condition that occurs only in identical twins that share the same placenta and transfuse blood through shared blood vessels.

While the prognosis was ironically slightly better for Brandon than Billy, they explained that there was no cure. While I could try to remove amniotic fluid to “buy some time”, (having done this immediately caused me to go into a premature labor), ultimately there was a 10 to 15% chance at best of either of the twins surviving.

At the time of my diagnosis of this rare condition I was about 5 months along and the prognosis for both twins was clearly very bleak. So much so in fact, it was strongly recommended that I abort both babies and “try again later for a healthy pregnancy”. This was not an option for me, so my husband and I returned home from the hospital feeling completely devastated and totally lost!

After crying out to God, I was contacted by a friend who told me about an experimental surgery that was being performed by only one surgeon in the world at that time. He was a surgeon from Venezuela who had developed a surgery that he was performing in Tampa, Florida. We were on the next plane to Tampa for this experimental laser fetal surgery.

The surgery itself went well however Brandon ultimately did not make it.


While this loss was was devastating, what was even more difficult was looking in the closet and seeing all of the twin outfits hanging side-by-side; wondering how I could ever possibly find the strength to take one of each of these outfits out of the closet to discard.

Even more difficult proved to be the required weekly ultrasounds. It was torture Putting on a happy face each week while we watched Billy growing and developing while seeing the lifeless little form of Brandon become smaller and smaller, slowing shrinking away along with all of the dreams of what life should have held for these precious twin boys.

The remainder of the pregnancy became a blur of anger, resentment, pleading, and bargaining with God for a miracle, followed by utter devastation as I reminded myself it was too late for a miracle! 

As Brandon became smaller in the weekly ultrasounds the void in my heart became larger and more encompassing. One day I couldn’t seem to keep from crying all day, I remember my husband sternly saying to me you have to stop this!! You have to be strong for Billy!! You can’t just keep mourning the loss of Brandon you have a healthy baby to think about!

I knew he was right and the guilt I felt was overwhelming! I didn’t know how to stop grieving! I knew I should be celebrating the precious healthy miracle I was carrying inside of me but how could I betray Brandon like that?

At that moment I cried out to God from a place of complete brokenness and asked Him to take away my grief and allow me to experience the joy of this precious miracle He had given me.

This is the moment I knew without a doubt that God was with me and His heart was broken along with mine! I could feel his arms of love around me; comforting me. 

I fell into a deep sleep and I had a dream that I know now, was a glimpse into heaven and the heavenly nursery of unborn babies that Perry Stone talked about in his video.

In my dream I looked through a window like you would see in a hospital infant nursery. What I saw brought about a healing that is hard to even put into words. I saw my sister-in-law Betty, who had tragically died years before, in a rocking chair holding Brandon and gently rocking him. When she noticed me there she looked up at me and had the most precious look on her face, I remember it like it was yesterday. 

Betty had been the only person I would trust with babysitting my older children. She had such a love for children beyond anyone I have ever known. I woke up with a clear image of the pure joy and pride Betty had in cuddling my little Brandon – a look that said he will be alright, I will take good care of him until you get here.

While it would be easy to argue that there was something subconscious or psychological that caused this dream, I know better! God came to me in my brokenness and my despair and He gave me a glimpse into heaven that I believe was very real and beyond just a simple dream.

On July 5, 1999 I gave birth to my twin boys. Celebrating my five pound healthy baby boy Billy, while saying my final goodbye to Brandon.

It was amazing to me that I had ever wondered if I would be able to look at my precious new little miracle without feeling this deep sorrow over the loss of the brother who looks exactly like him.  The truth of the matter is, I don’t believe I could have ever done this on my own.

Is God really there for the brokenhearted? You Bet He Is!!! I am living proof of this promise that he has given us all in His Holy word. 

I want you to know that if you are suffering from a loss today, and you feel there is no escape and no way out of your pain, loneliness, and grief, He wants to bring you comfort- all you have to do is cry out to Him. He promises to be there! 

Cheryl Shepherd

2020FullCircle [email protected]

Perry Stones’s story title “The unborn in Heaven” can be found at:

https://youtu.be/95f_sUTEJKs