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Dreams of Comfort for the Brokenhearted
By Cheryl Shepherd
Have you ever received a dream that you knew was from God for the purpose of providing comfort during a particularly desperate time? If you’re a skeptic, based on my studies in Psychology and Sociology, I certainly would have agreed before my mind was changed by a very incredible dream.
I was recently reminded, while listening to a story told by evangelist Perry Stone, of how drastically my mind was changed.
Perry spoke of a dream he had about a child that he and his wife had lost lost due to a miscarriage and that reminded me of my own similar experience. In his dream he had a very vivid picture of this precious little girl waiting to meet him in heaven.
What was especially touching about this story was the fact that years later, he came across someone who had painted a picture of this beautiful little girl, matching the little girl in his dream in complete detail down to the ragged stuffed animal she clung to! There were many more facets of the story that were certainly miraculous and reminded me of a time that brought to life a scripture that has become very dear to me. Psalms 34:18 says, the Lord is near to the brokenhearted; He saves those crushed in spirit.
Twenty-one years ago I lost my son Billy’s identical twin brother Brandon, due to a rare condition called twin to twin transfusion syndrome.
While I can’t begin to imagine the grief experienced by a mother who has to say goodbye to a child at any age, the impact of this loss for me was a profound one in a different way, yet devastating just as any mother knows who has experienced never being able to meet or hold her unborn child.
At that time there was very little known about twin to twin transfusion syndrome or TTTS. It was explained to me that this was a rare condition that occurs only in identical twins that share the same placenta and transfuse blood through shared blood vessels.
While the prognosis was ironically slightly better for Brandon than Billy, they explained that there was no cure. While I could try to remove amniotic fluid to “buy some time”, (having done this immediately caused me to go into a premature labor), ultimately there was a 10 to 15% chance at best of either of the twins surviving.
At the time of my diagnosis of this rare condition I was about 5 months along and the prognosis for both twins was clearly very bleak. So much so in fact, it was strongly recommended that I abort both babies and “try again later for a healthy pregnancy”. This was not an option for me, so my husband and I returned home from the hospital feeling completely devastated and totally lost!
After crying out to God, I was contacted by a friend who told me about an experimental surgery that was being performed by only one surgeon in the world at that time. He was a surgeon from Venezuela who had developed a surgery that he was performing in Tampa, Florida. We were on the next plane to Tampa for this experimental laser fetal surgery.
The surgery itself went well however Brandon ultimately did not make it.
While this loss was was devastating, what was even more difficult was looking in the closet and seeing all of the twin outfits hanging side-by-side; wondering how I could ever possibly find the strength to take one of each of these outfits out of the closet to discard.
Even more difficult proved to be the required weekly ultrasounds. It was torture Putting on a happy face each week while we watched Billy growing and developing while seeing the lifeless little form of Brandon become smaller and smaller, slowing shrinking away along with all of the dreams of what life should have held for these precious twin boys.
The remainder of the pregnancy became a blur of anger, resentment, pleading, and bargaining with God for a miracle, followed by utter devastation as I reminded myself it was too late for a miracle!
As Brandon became smaller in the weekly ultrasounds the void in my heart became larger and more encompassing. One day I couldn’t seem to keep from crying all day, I remember my husband sternly saying to me you have to stop this!! You have to be strong for Billy!! You can’t just keep mourning the loss of Brandon you have a healthy baby to think about!
I knew he was right and the guilt I felt was overwhelming! I didn’t know how to stop grieving! I knew I should be celebrating the precious healthy miracle I was carrying inside of me but how could I betray Brandon like that?
At that moment I cried out to God from a place of complete brokenness and asked Him to take away my grief and allow me to experience the joy of this precious miracle He had given me.
This is the moment I knew without a doubt that God was with me and His heart was broken along with mine! I could feel his arms of love around me; comforting me.
I fell into a deep sleep and I had a dream that I know now, was a glimpse into heaven and the heavenly nursery of unborn babies that Perry Stone talked about in his video.
In my dream I looked through a window like you would see in a hospital infant nursery. What I saw brought about a healing that is hard to even put into words. I saw my sister-in-law Betty, who had tragically died years before, in a rocking chair holding Brandon and gently rocking him. When she noticed me there she looked up at me and had the most precious look on her face, I remember it like it was yesterday.
Betty had been the only person I would trust with babysitting my older children. She had such a love for children beyond anyone I have ever known. I woke up with a clear image of the pure joy and pride Betty had in cuddling my little Brandon – a look that said he will be alright, I will take good care of him until you get here.
While it would be easy to argue that there was something subconscious or psychological that caused this dream, I know better! God came to me in my brokenness and my despair and He gave me a glimpse into heaven that I believe was very real and beyond just a simple dream.
On July 5, 1999 I gave birth to my twin boys. Celebrating my five pound healthy baby boy Billy, while saying my final goodbye to Brandon.
It was amazing to me that I had ever wondered if I would be able to look at my precious new little miracle without feeling this deep sorrow over the loss of the brother who looks exactly like him. The truth of the matter is, I don’t believe I could have ever done this on my own.
Is God really there for the brokenhearted? You Bet He Is!!! I am living proof of this promise that he has given us all in His Holy word.
I want you to know that if you are suffering from a loss today, and you feel there is no escape and no way out of your pain, loneliness, and grief, He wants to bring you comfort- all you have to do is cry out to Him. He promises to be there!
Cheryl Shepherd
2020FullCircle vision@gmail.com
Perry Stones’s story title “The unborn in Heaven” can be found at:
https://youtu.be/95f_sUTEJKs
Experiencing Grief
By Cheryl Shepherd
Grief is such a strange thing. It seems to know just how much we can handle of it before we will crumble beneath it’s weight.
It shows up suddenly and ever so quietly leaving a wake of shocking raw emotion, then…dissipates into a million pieces, attached to the memories it came with and returning us once again to our previous state…
-numbness
-denial
-anger
-fear
-regret
…but little by little, doing the job it came to accomplish – forcing us to heal – forcing us to take one more step forward, toward becoming a shadow of who we were before the loss or perhaps who we are meant to be in spite of it.
We need strength for embracing these times of complete weakness.
We must be strong and resilient under these unbearable circumstances. One devastating wave after another; one hopeless day after another – Some days ending in an all encompassing fear that we could have never imagined – yet somehow we are not broken.
It takes great strength to allow grief to take its time in doing what it came to do.
It takes courage to take care of yourself while being the rock for those who rely on you, in the midst of the brokenness and sorrow.
Still, we must hold on to hope and allow healing, no matter how painful and at times seemingly pointless.
We must forge ahead for ourselves and for those we love.
If you are reading this and you have suffered a loss, I know you don’t feel strong in this moment but you ARE strong – you ARE resilient and you WILL survive this…even if only to provide a small ray of hope for someone traveling this desolate path; just to say “you are not alone”.
You must live life as normal as you can in the wake of such turmoil and sadness. You must get up each day…wash your face – feel the sunshine on your skin – talk to God – yell at God (He understands), cry and though it may be the most empty words you will ever speak…say “thank you Lord for this day and for the the strength you have given me to make it to tomorrow.”
Then, when tomorrow comes …start the process again. It will get easier.
And when it would appear that all hope is lost – keep fighting and persevere! Remember you are a conquerer in the greatest battle anyone can face!
You have suffered a great loss and while it’s true, you may no longer be whole and perhaps you feel that you will never be whole again; you are now an unwilling member of a group of warriors;
-wounded from battle but mending;
-hurting but healing;
-broken yet finding strength;
-defeated but continuing to fight this battle to its completion…wherever that may lead.
Above all, please remember to ask God for strength when you feel gripped by the reality of how frightening this road ahead may seem. Allow those who create the interwoven fabric of your life, to support you and continue to push you forward through the blinding pain in the midst of these darkest of moments.
And when grief has finally done it’s job… you will find the ability to
-grasp a moment to reflect on a memory
-a moment to appreciate
-and yes; even a moment to laugh. This will bring healing to your soul.
May you be fearless in stepping out and living a life worthy of the memory of your dear loved one.
Jesus the River
Rivers are a shadow of Jesus. When God made rivers, he was thinking about how to display the glory of the Son in this form of expression. Before a river was for drinking, swimming, calming, or any activity, it was to unlock a facet in the Son of God.
Why am I talking about rivers today? Am I bankrupt with other topics? Not at all. The Holy Spirit is highlighting it to me to speak to you about today. You will never be the same! You may be saying, oh my God, this is crazy, how can a river change my life today? Can’t you see the mess I am living in? The high-cost bills waiting to be paid? The kids at school going out of my control? Not to tell you about the chaotic surrounding where I live. A river, he said!
Yes, there is a river that will take care of the entire long list you thought of. It’s not the nearby river, nor the amazon river or any other river. IT IS THE RIVER OF GOD that is running toward you and that you won’t see without a spiritual revelation and a one on one encounter in! I command your eyes to BE OPEN, SEE THE RIVER.
Didn’t Jesus tell the Samaritan prostitute woman at the well that the water he gives can satisfy her forever than the natural water she was drinking from? And yes, she left her JAR after she drank of the TRUE WATER OF LIFE, Jesus Christ. I believe that woman was thirsty to come to that well at noon to withdraw some water and the reason she left her JAR is that the spiritual water of Jesus satisfied her first, she had her thirsting priorities fixed and reordered. Also, Jesus who was hungry and sent his disciples to bring some food didn’t eat anymore after he ministered to that woman.
“But he said to them, “I have food to eat that you know nothing about.” Then his disciples said to each other, “Could someone have brought him food?” My food,” said Jesus, “is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work.” John 4:32-34
Did the Lord eat later natural food? Yes, he did. Did that life-changed woman drink later natural water? yes, she surely did. The satisfying spiritual activity delayed these needs for some time later. The spiritual hunger and thirst are far greater than the physical and once met strongly in the spirit; they can postpone the natural ones. How did Moses live without food for forty days? He was in a strong spiritual encounter with the Lord on the mountain. I know of people who forget about eating when they are doing something they are passionate about or needed to be done. It is a possible thing but it excels when the spirit realm is involved!
Back to the river! Jesus is your good shepherd and he leads you to still waters and refreshes your soul. Jesus is likened to the bread of life, the living water, and different prophetic aspects too. So what is the difference between Jesus the water and Jesus the river? It’s a good question, I am glad you asked.
The river speaks of the movement, the strength, the abundance, and the direction! Many are experiencing the Lord as the water and the bread but few are encountering him as THE RIVER. This is something God wants you to know about and experience! Allow him to introduce himself to you as the river, respond to the invitation to jump in him, let him take you to where he is going, let him supply you abundantly, and let him fill you powerfully. These are days where the Lord will use those who know him as the river and live in the river. Those who are satisfied with little sprinkles will be used in a very limited way. Go for an upgrade because the needs are great and the darkness is covering the whole earth. I call you a person of the RIVER of God.
“I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.” John 10:10
Tony Francis
Heroes of Holiness Will Arise!
By Robert Hotchkin
As we come into the new era of this new year, God is inviting His people into something that He’s been very intentionally leading up to for more than two decades.
For well over 20 years now, God has been pouring out a revelation of His Father’s heart along with the tangible reality of His certain love. This has been one of the main messages and manifestations of charismatic Christianity since heaven invaded the earth through the Toronto Outpouring in early 1994. It has led to a profound revelation of how radically loved and totally accepted we are in the Beloved (see Ephesians 1:6), as well as an epoch of miracles, signs, and wonders as we press into and worship the One who loves us so. Bodies have been healed. Souls have been restored. Angelic feathers and heavenly gemstones have appeared. The dead have been raised. Revivals have broken out. It’s been glorious.
It has also been building up to something that is strong on God’s heart. He is inviting you, and all of His people, into right now.
What God Has Been Up To
The heavenly agenda of these past 20+ years goes well beyond our realizing how completely loved and accepted we are in Christ. God’s desire has been that with this realization, the lies and burdens of religious performance would be torn down so that we could more fully and powerfully step into the reason that we are here.
Have you ever wondered why we don’t go straight to heaven as soon as we get saved? The answer is right there in Genesis 1:26-28.
Since Day Six, God’s plan has been to have a people in relationship with Him who operate as His agents of impact in the earth, stewarding creation on His behalf and to His glory. One of the main ways we do this is to realize that we are made in His image (see Genesis 1:26). Choosing to operate in His character and nature. Choosing to be holy, for He is holy (see Isaiah 6:3, Revelation 4:8). Not trying to be righteous to earn favor, blessing, or relationship from Him. That’s the doomed, performance-pressure, and striving of religious self-righteousness. But instead, God desires for us to realize that through the Love Gift of His Son He has made us holy as He is holy. Not only so that we can be restored to relationship with Him, but from within that relationship we can be champions of righteousness on His behalf – Heroes of Holiness who positively impact all of creation with every righteous decision we make.
You Are So Much More Powerful than you Realize
We see the proof of all this in Romans 5:18-19 (NLT):
“Adam’s one sin brings condemnation for everyone, but Christ’s one act of righteousness brings a right relationship with God and new life for everyone. Because one person disobeyed God, many became sinners. But because one other person obeyed God, many will be made righteous.”
When Adam chose to disobey, it was not just him who was made unrighteous. It allowed unrighteousness to enter the earth and affect all. When Jesus chose to obey, it was not Him who was made righteous (He already was), it made righteousness available to all. Decisions made by those in a relationship with God in the earth impact all of creation. You have the ability to operate in heroic holiness and make a real difference in the world every time you choose to embrace the power and potential of your righteousness in Christ.
The choices you make ripple throughout all creation. Your decisions not only affect your life, they affect the whole wide world. Choose sin and darkness, and sin and darkness enter the world. But, and this is a HUGE BUT, choose to operate in the heroic holiness of who you truly are in Christ, and righteousness ripples throughout the earth.
Choose love, peace, joy, generosity, fidelity, integrity, patience, faithfulness, mercy, kindness or forgiveness, and they are released out into all the world.
Go and Sin No More
In John 8:1-11, we read the story of the woman who was caught in adultery. When this sinner encounters Jesus she is transformed. Not only because she is set free from the power of sin by the mercy of Messiah, but also because she is launched into a revelation of her true identity in Christ that will continually transform her life as well as impact all of creation. This is why Jesus tells her, “Go and sin no more.” (John 8:11b NKJV). He is not saying “sin no more” so you will be forgiven. He already forgave her earlier in verse 11 when He declared that He would not condemn her. When he invites her to “sin no more,” He is inviting her into a ministry of heroic holiness. Not to earn mercy forgiveness, favor or blessing – she already has all of that in her born-again relationship with her Savior (see Ephesians 1:3, 2 Peter 1:3). But to propel her into what has been God’s plan for her since Day Six – to operate as one of His Dominion Stewards in the earth who shatters darkness by choosing to arise and shine as a Hero of Holiness!
Be Holy in All Your Conduct
Look at 1 Peter 1:15-16:
“He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, because it is written, ‘Be holy, for I am holy.’”
If we do not understand who God really is and what He is really like, we could easily misconstrue this passage of scripture in 1 Peter. It is not a command to perform for acceptance. It is an invitation to step into our true born-again identity of being made in God’s image and being about our Father’s business in the earth at a level of effectiveness and impact we have yet to even come close to fully realizing or even understanding.
As New Testament believers, 1 Peter 1:15-16 (and the scriptures in Leviticus it echoes back to) are not some religious quid pro quo burden of performance God is laying upon us while saying, “Hey jump through My rule-hoops or I will smite thee!” No. This is God reminding us who we really are in Him. This is God inviting us to step into our true born-again character and nature. This is God helping us to a global ministry of radical impact in the earth through the decisions we make with our free will to look and sound and act just like our Father in Whose image we are made. This is how we co-labor with Him as His dominion stewards in the earth!
Keep My Commands
We are in a John 14:15 hour. God is reminding us that if we love Him we will keep His commands. This is not a demand to prove devotion. Or a stipulation to earn favor and blessing. This is God helping us step into who we truly are and long to be. This is an opportunity for the fulfillment of purpose, potential, and identity at a level we barely comprehend.
For 20+ years God has been going out of His way to help us see and know and feel that we are totally and completely loved by Him (see John 3:16). Loving God is not a way to get His love, it is the natural response to the certainty of His love (see 1 John 4:19). Obeying His commands is not an offering or sacrifice for relationship, it is an embracing of powerful identity and purpose within that relationship.
Are You Ready to Get Radical?
A company of righteous radicals is arising. These Heroes of Holiness truly know who they are in Christ. They know how loved they are. They know in whose image they are made. They know all of creation has been longing for them to walk in the power, purpose and passion of their true identity.
These Heroes of Holiness are waking up to the incredible power they have to impact the world through the decisions they make. They know that when they choose to operate in righteousness, patience, honor, unity mercy, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, forgiveness, love, peace, joy, gentleness, self-control – when they choose to be who they truly are in Christ – these divine attributes ripple throughout all creation. The Kingdom comes. His will is done. Light shatters darkness. Territory is taken. Powers and principalities are torn down. Not with carnal weapons or natural strength, but with weapons that are mighty in God (see 2 Corinthians 10:4), wielded by Heroes of Holiness who are powerfully aware of who they truly are.
Consecrate Yourself Anew
Do you want to be one of His Heroes of Holiness? Tell Him today. Take a Joshua 3:5 moment and consecrate yourself anew, declaring that by His grace and through the leading of His Spirit you will walk in greater and greater fulfillment of who you are truly are in Christ. He will work wonders in your midst!
Robert Hotchkin
Men on the Frontlines / Robert Hotchkin Ministries
e-mail: Robert@menonthefrontlines.com
website: www.roberthotchkin.com
Robert Hotchkin is an author, minister, speaker, and media host. He is the founder of Men on the Frontlines, and one of the core leaders of Patricia King Ministries. He hosts the weekly Heroes Arise broadcast, co-hosts the show Propel with Patricia King, and is a regular guest and co-host of the show Supernatural Life on GodTV. Robert’s newest book, 31 Decrees of Blessing for Men, is a powerful daily devotional that activates men to walk in all that they have been blessed with as sons of God.
Kool-Aid And A Cookie
By Kay Franklin
One of my fondest memories from childhood is the cup of kool-aid and a cookie that I would get on Tuesdays after attending Mrs. Butler’s bible class. Mrs. Butler would share a bible story, kool-aid, and a cookie one day each week after school with a room full of elementary school students. It was a highlight for us. As I reflect on those days when we would make our way to her house, I’m grateful to have such a memory to share. I wonder where the other children are now and if they have continued in walking for the Lord or if they are chasing after “kool-aid and cookies“.
God’s Presence in my life has led me to amazing places. He has blessed me in so many ways. All I can say is that “I was glad when they said unto me let us go into the house of the Lord.” Psalm 122:1. This verse is significant because we find ourselves quarantined, not gathering. We find ourselves distancing and not huddling together listening to a story while wondering “what flavor kool-aid Mrs. Butler had prepared or what kind of cookies that she would serve“. I encourage you today that God what God has for you is beyond your wildest dreams. “Eye has not seen nor ear heard what God has prepared for those who love Him”.1 Corinthians 2:9.
God bless you!
She killed him then he killed her
When Elijah the prophet fled because he got scared of Jezebel’s threatening to take his life, he became tired, drained, depressed, and suicidal but it started with fear. Then God met him on the mountain in the cave, and asked him what are you doing here Elijah? He asked him that twice and twice was the same answer.
“I have been very zealous for the LORD, the God of hosts; for the sons of Israel have forsaken Your covenant, torn down Your altars and killed Your prophets with the sword. And I alone am left; and they seek my life, to take it away.” 1 Kings 19:14
“They seek my life”? Was that accurate? Let’s see what happened and why Elijah fled:
“Now Ahab told Jezebel all that Elijah had done, and how he had killed all the prophets with the sword. Then Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah, saying, “So may the gods do to me and even more, if I do not make your life as the life of one of them by tomorrow about this time.” And he was afraid and arose and ran for his life and came to Beersheba, which belongs to Judah, and left his servant there.” 1 Kings 19:1-3
Elijah answered with pride and wasn’t real. He could have told the Lord sincerely; well I am afraid of Jezebel Sir that is why. When we are afraid, we may exaggerate. It was one woman who threatened him but Elijah said: THEY seek my life.
Elijah answered the Lord in a spiritual heroic way: I had to flee and preserve myself and my ministry because I am the only voice left for you O God (and there is none like me. This is my adding). Am I against fleeing to protect our lives? No. But was he led by the Spirit to do that or was he fear-driven? Because sometimes the Spirit leads us to stay and confront and other times to flee. Jesus left immediately on many occasions and attempts to kill him but he was motivated by love and not by fear. Because fear is a sin! And Jesus knew it wasn’t his time to die this way.
In my opinion, God asked Elijah twice to give him an invitation to be real and humble but maybe he couldn’t swallow that the MIGHTY Elijah who just had a great conference on the mount Carmel is now running from a woman in authority. He could have been real with God because after all, God knows the heart. Jezebel threatened Elijah to put seeds of fear in him to control him and push him away because Elijah was the real threat to her worship system. If she wanted to kill him she could have taken him by surprise and not give him an appointment “tomorrow about this time”. If she had the chance to kill him, it was before the restoration of God’s people because now Elijah was more empowered.
“Answer me, O LORD, answer me, that this people may know that You, O LORD, are God, and that You have turned their heart back again.” Then the fire of the LORD fell and consumed the burnt offering and the wood and the stones and the dust, and licked up the water that was in the trench. all the people saw it, they fell on their faces; and they said, “The LORD, He is God; the LORD, He is God.” 1 Kings 37-39
Sadly, Elijah kept hanging to pride on Horeb’s mountain while God offered him invitations to humble himself and be real before him in that cave conversation. Elijah insisted that he was the man for the hour alone and that God’s power only works through him but God told him he kept 7000 for him. After that, we see that Elijah’s ministry came to a closing chapter and that he was only allowed to anoint others for continuity. The same thing happened with Moses when he beat the rock twice; his ministry ended after that act of disobedience fueled by pride that was disguised as anger. Then Joshua was appointed next!
On the other hand, David the king after committing adultery with Bathsheba and killing her husband, was humble, real, and repenting when Prophet Nathan confronted him with the word of the Lord and his ministry continued and his relationship with the Lord. We read him repenting in Psalms 51!
It’s true that Jezebel only threatened to kill Elijah but actually she did kill his influence and ministry at the end because Elijah swallowed the bait of fear mixed with pride and because he didn’t find the place of humility in the presence of the Lord, the Lord resisted the proud. But the good news is that Elijah also killed Jezebel and her ministry because he left a prophecy of judgment from the Lord against her that was after her even after he was taken to heaven.
“Of Jezebel also has the LORD spoken, saying, ‘The dogs will eat Jezebel in the district of Jezreel.’” 1 Kings 21: 23
How many times have we answered the Lord in pride when he was extending to us invitations to be real and humble?
“Pride goes before destruction, And a haughty spirit before stumbling.” Proverbs 16:18
“Before destruction the heart of man is haughty, But humility goes before honor.” Proverbs 18:12
“But He gives a greater grace. Therefore it says, “GOD IS OPPOSED TO THE PROUD, BUT GIVES GRACE TO THE HUMBLE.” James 4:6
Tony Francis