Lessons from Dr. Phil on the Perils of People Pleasing: From a Recovering People Pleaser

Friendship is a beautiful aspect of life that brings joy, support, and companionship. However, when the desire to please others takes precedence over our own needs and values, it can lead to an imbalance in our relationships. People-pleasing, while often well-intentioned, can hinder the development of authentic friendships, further damaging our fragile self-worth.

I was recently reminded of my journey of learning how to avoid the pitfalls of people-pleasing and foster genuine connections by starting with learning to love myself. A dear friend recalled one of our first phone conversations when we discussed people-pleasing. She mentioned an episode of Dr. Phil from years ago, stating that what she learned on that show was “life-changing.” I chuckled to myself, contemplating whether I should tell her that I was actually on that episode. When I finally revealed the truth, her reaction was more exuberant than I had expected. What struck me was that the words she spoke were the same words I used to convince my husband to go on the show with me, despite his initial reluctance. I had said, “What if doing this show could change just one person’s life?” The statement seemed dramatic even to me, but my friend echoed those very words. It made me wonder if I had heard her correctly.

Reflecting on that time, my friend helped me understand why someone might find the advice from Dr. Phil on that show “life-changing.” For me, his advice was indeed profound, and I carried the lessons I learned with me, building upon them over the years.

These are the life-altering lessons, simple yet not easy. The first lesson is about the dangers of people-pleasing. Rooted in the fear of rejection or conflict, people-pleasing involves constantly seeking approval and prioritizing others’ needs over our own. While it may seem like a selfless act, it can have detrimental effects on our well-being, friendships, and self-worth.

Dr. Phil also emphasized the loss of authenticity that comes with people-pleasing. When we constantly strive to please others, we suppress our true selves, leading to a lack of authenticity in our friendships. Genuine connections are built on mutual understanding, acceptance, and respect for each other’s individuality. By sacrificing our own needs and desires, we risk losing our unique identity and becoming mere reflections of others’ expectations. I had to be honest and admit that this was true of me.

Another lesson I gleaned from Dr. Phil was the imbalance in relationships that people-pleasing often creates. In friendships, one person may consistently give while the other takes. This dynamic can lead to resentment, as the people-pleaser may feel unappreciated or taken advantage of. Genuine friendships thrive on reciprocity, where both parties contribute equally and support each other’s growth.

Emotional exhaustion was a realization that came to me when contemplating everything I had learned after the show aired. Constantly striving to meet others’ expectations can be emotionally draining. People-pleasers often find themselves overwhelmed, struggling to maintain a facade of perfection and meet everyone’s demands. This exhaustion hinders the ability to form deep, meaningful connections, leaving little energy for self-care and genuine emotional investment. Moments that should be shared as memorable experiences become blurred, vague memories of overexertion and regret.

Fostering authentic friendships became my mission. I realized that self-awareness and the ability to recognize my own needs, values, and boundaries were essential for my survival. It wasn’t an easy task, and it didn’t happen overnight. Understanding that it is okay to prioritize our well-being and say no when necessary was uncomfortable at first. However, over time, I discovered that by being true to ourselves, we attract friends who appreciate and respect our authenticity.

Communication emerged as another major lesson from this unique experience. Open and honest communication is vital in any friendship, and it became even more crucial with my best friend, my husband, who often took a back seat to those who demanded much of my attention previously. To be authentic, we must express our thoughts, feelings, and concerns openly, while also actively listening to our friends, spouses, and family. Healthy friendships and relationships are built on mutual understanding and acceptance of each other’s perspectives.

Establishing healthy boundaries was and still is one of the most challenging lessons I had to learn. Learning to say no when overwhelmed or when a request compromises our values doesn’t come easy for a recovering people-pleaser. However, boundaries are essential because they create a balanced dynamic and foster respect for each other’s individuality.

Finally, there is the dynamic of mutual support. Authentic friendships are characterized by mutual support and encouragement. We should celebrate each other’s successes, provide a listening ear during challenging times, and offer constructive feedback when needed. By nurturing a supportive environment, we create a space where both parties can grow and thrive.

The most meaningful moment of this experience wasn’t even on camera but during a commercial break when Dr. Phil, known for his sometimes harsh approach, leaned over to me and quietly said, “God made you beautiful, articulate, and intelligent, and you need to believe you are worthy of true friendship.” That moment will be etched in my memory forever because it was life-changing for me. He saw a person who didn’t see her own value and spoke words of encouragement and affirmation, much more than psychological advice. It was as if a father was speaking to his daughter. From that point on, I wanted to give that gift to others who may not believe they are worthy of love.

From a Christian perspective, people-pleasing can be seen as a stumbling block in our faith journey. A powerful passage in the Bible, Galatians 1:10, asks, “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.” As followers of Christ, our ultimate aim should be to please God rather than seeking validation from others. This is where we find our true self-worth. Jesus teaches us to love one another as ourselves (Mark 12:31) and to prioritize our relationship with Him above all else (Matthew 6:33). By aligning our actions and intentions with God’s will, we can cultivate friendships rooted in love, authenticity, and mutual respect. As we seek to please God, we can trust that He will guide us in forming genuine connections that honor Him and bring joy and fulfillment to our lives.

While the desire to please others is natural, it is essential to strike a balance between meeting others’ needs and prioritizing our own well-being, keeping God as our main priority. Authentic friendships are built on mutual respect, understanding, and acceptance of each other’s individuality. By embracing our identity in Christ and who we were created to be, setting healthy boundaries, and fostering open communication, we can cultivate genuine connections that enrich our lives. Remember, as this wise doctor reminded me, true friends appreciate you for who you are, not for what you can do for them.

Dedicated to Gavi. 💞 Thank you for the reminder that started a lasting friendship for which I am eternally grateful!

How does Presenting Our Bodies as a Living Sacrifice relate to Self-Control, Food Addictions, and the Fruits of the Spirit?

In the book of Romans, chapter 12, verse 1, Paul urges Christians to present their bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God. This means that we should offer our entire being, including our physical bodies, to God as an act of worship. It is a call to surrender our desires, ambitions, and goals to God and to live according to His will.

I recently had a “light bulb moment” when I read 1 Corinthians 9:27, where Paul talks about disciplining our bodies. He says, “But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.” Here, Paul emphasizes the importance of self-control and discipline in the Christian life. He recognizes that our bodies have natural desires and tendencies that can lead us astray, so we must intentionally control our thoughts, actions, and behaviors.

Disciplining our bodies involves making intentional choices that honor God and promote our spiritual growth. This may include fasting, prayer, exercise, and avoiding sinful behaviors. It requires us to be mindful of our thoughts and actions and make choices that align with God’s will.

Presenting our bodies as a living sacrifice and disciplining our bodies are both crucial aspects of the Christian life. They require us to surrender our desires to God and intentionally live in a way that honors Him. By doing so, we can grow in our faith and become more like Christ.

When it comes to food addictions and self-control, presenting our bodies as a living sacrifice and disciplining our bodies take on particular significance. Food addictions can be incredibly challenging to overcome and can have a significant impact on our physical and emotional health. However, by surrendering our desires to God and making intentional choices to honor Him, we can develop the self-control necessary to overcome these addictions.

In Galatians 5:22-23, Paul talks about the fruits of the Spirit, which include love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. By cultivating these fruits in our lives, we can develop the self-control necessary to overcome food addictions and other challenges. This requires us to be intentional about our choices and seek God’s guidance and strength.

We can receive help in this area through the support of our friends, support groups like Warrior Girlfriends, and talented health and spiritual coaches like Cynthia Ray and Jill Janiec. They share their knowledge, wisdom, and God-given expertise, as well as spiritual guidance, with us, along with their own inspiring communities!

Ultimately, presenting our bodies as a living sacrifice and disciplining our bodies is about living a life that honors God in all areas, including our physical health. By doing so, we can experience the fullness of the abundant life that Christ offers us and become more like Him in every way.

I am praying for your success in this area as we all support each other in this journey!

A Heart of Gratitude

I’ve recently been thinking about all I have to be grateful for in my life, but even more than that, how much it has impacted me to be on the receiving end of gratitude and even just being in the presence of grateful people.

Feeling appreciated is important to us all. Being recognized for sacrifice and hard work is a fuel that propels us forward and a compass that often allows us to navigate life’s treacherous waters. Gratitude is a powerful virtue that holds immense significance in the life of a Christian. It is not merely a fleeting feeling of thankfulness, but rather a transformative attitude that can shape our perspective, relationships, and overall well-being. When we cultivate a heart of gratitude, we open ourselves up to experiencing the abundant blessings and grace that God has given us.

There are more examples of the profound effects of gratitude in our daily life than can be counted.
First and one of the most important things gratitude creates, is that it deepens our relationship with God. Gratitude is an expression of our faith and trust in God’s providence. When we acknowledge and appreciate the blessings He has given us, we draw closer to Him. Gratitude helps us recognize His hand in every aspect of our lives, leading to a deeper sense of intimacy and connection with our Heavenly Father.

Additionally gratitude shifts our focus from lack to abundance. In a world that often emphasizes what we lack, gratitude redirects our attention to the abundance that surrounds us. As Christians, we are called to be content in all circumstances, and gratitude helps us cultivate a mindset of contentment. It reminds us of the countless blessings we have received, both big and small, and helps us appreciate the richness of God’s provision.

Gratitude also strengthens our relationships. Living in a place of focusing on what we are grateful for, has the power to transform our interactions with others. When we express gratitude towards our loved ones, friends, and even strangers, we create an atmosphere of love, appreciation, and encouragement. Gratitude fosters humility which is essential in helping us recognize the value and worth of those around us. It strengthens our relationships and builds a sense of community within the body of Christ.

It inspires generosity and service. Gratitude is not meant to be kept to ourselves; it compels us to share our blessings with others. As Christians, we are called to be generous and serve those in need. Gratitude fuels our desire to give back, to be a blessing to others, and to share the love of Christ through our actions. It motivates us to be compassionate, kind, and selfless in our interactions with others.

Gratitude actually enhances our overall well-being and should be considered a part of our wellness plan. Numerous studies have shown that gratitude has a positive impact on our mental, emotional, and physical well-being. When we practice gratitude, our stress levels decrease, and our overall happiness and satisfaction increase. Gratitude helps us develop a positive outlook on life, even in the midst of challenges, and promotes a sense of peace and contentment.

I have concluded that cultivating the habit and awareness of living in a constant state of gratitude is a transformative attitude that will reap rewards for years and even generations to come. So if being grateful has such a profound effect on us and everyone around us. If it deepens our relationship with God, shifts our focus from lack to abundance, strengthens our relationships, enhances our overall well-being, and inspires generosity and service then why are we not more conscious of living in a constant state of gratitude? Well, because it’s impossible to be grateful and hateful or resentful or grumpy simultaneously. We have to choose one or the other.

My prayer for us all is that we choose to begin our day by focusing on cultivating a heart of gratitude. Lets remember to give thanks to God for His immeasurable love and grace, and to express our gratitude to those around us.

Lets choose gratitude and choose to make gratitude a constant presence in our lives, shaping us into the image of Christ and bringing glory to God.

Overcoming Fear: A Christian Woman’s Journey to Trusting in God

As a Christian woman, fear can be a constant battle. We are bombarded with messages of fear from the media, our peers, and even our own thoughts. Fear can be paralyzing, causing us to doubt ourselves and our faith. However, as believers, we have the power to overcome fear through our relationship with God.

One of the most common fears that Christian women face is the fear of not being enough. We may feel like we are not good enough mothers, wives, friends, or even Christians. This fear can lead to feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt. However, we must remember that our worth is not based on our performance or accomplishments. Our worth comes from being a child of God, and He loves us unconditionally.

Another fear that Christian women face is the fear of the unknown. We may worry about the future and what it holds for us and our loved ones. However, we must trust in God’s plan for our lives. He knows the plans He has for us, and they are plans for good and not for harm (Jeremiah 29:11). We must have faith that God will guide us through any challenges that come our way.

Fear can also manifest itself in our relationships with others. We may fear rejection or judgment from others, causing us to hold back and not fully engage in our relationships. However, we must remember that God calls us to love one another and to build each other up (1 Thessalonians 5:11). We must trust in God’s love for us and allow that love to overflow into our relationships with others.

Finally, as Christian women, we may fear the spiritual battles that we face. We may feel like we are not equipped to handle the attacks of the enemy. However, we must remember that we have the power of the Holy Spirit within us. We can put on the armor of God and stand firm against the enemy’s schemes (Ephesians 6:10-18).

In conclusion, fear is a common struggle for Christian women. However, we must remember that we have the power to overcome fear through our relationship with God. We must trust in His love for us, His plan for our lives, and His power within us. With God by our side, we can face any fear and come out victorious.

Lord, do you care?

KINGDOM FOOTPRINTS

Lord, do you not care?

You may have recently experienced heartbreak, disappointment, or fear. You may have genuine reasons to doubt the very existence of God. You might wonder what kind of God allows good people to die while the wicked continue to live. Why does God allow some to suffer in poverty, sickness, and pain while others waste resources lavishly? What kind of God permits divorce, diseases, and death in the world? Does He truly care?

You are not alone. God can lift you from the depths of worry and concern to the embrace of His love and care.

“And the same day, when the evening had come, He said to them, ‘Let us pass over to the other side.’ And when they had sent away the multitude, they took Him as He was in the ship. And there were also other little ships with Him. And there arose a great storm of wind, and the waves beat into the ship, so that it was now full. And He was in the hinder part of the ship, asleep on a pillow. And they woke Him, and said to Him, ‘Master, do you not care that we perish?’ And He arose, and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, ‘Peace, be still.’ And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm.” – Mark 4:35-38

Your trials do not define you; they reveal the strength of your faith. God is concerned with how we face adversity.

Life is not solely lived in the light beams of the church worship hall. Life encompasses more than the time we spend with mentors, friends, and family. There will surely be times when our faith is tested, and we may find ourselves asking the Lord, “Do you not care?”

The Scriptures are clear: worry about nothing, but pray about everything.

“Be careful for nothing; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.” – Philippians 4:6

The disciples of Jesus had faced difficult storms before, but they had never encountered a situation as complicated as this one. Jesus was with them, yet He was sleeping. If the storm grabs your attention, then the Master can still the storm. He is there with you through calm and storm.

God’s silence does not mean He is unconcerned; He is always there with you. Remember, only God can calm the storms of your life. Many things that happen in your life may be unexplainable, but in the midst of the darkest night, Jesus cares for you. Does Jesus care? Oh yes, He cares.

Good Morning

Ubong Usoro

The Importance of Faith In the Life of the Christian Believer

“For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith” (1 John 5:4).

What Is Faith?
Faith is a strong feeling of trust in someone or something
For the Christian believer, faith is belief and trust in one God
According to Hebrews 11:1 “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen”

Faith is so critical and important in our lives, as Christians, that it occurs or mentioned 100 times in the Bible – 28 times in the Old Testament and 72 times in the New Testament.

“By faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that the things which are seen were not made of things which are visible” (Hebrews 11:3).
The world or creation itself was founded in faith when God made the following decrees;
• “Let there be light” – (Genesis 1:3)
• “Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters and let divide the waters from the waters” – (Genesis 1:6)
• “Let the waters under the heavens be gathered unto one place, and let the dry land appear” – (Genesis 1:9)
• “Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb that yields seed, and the fruit tree that yield fruit according to its kind” – (Genesis 1:11)
• The decree continues until the creation of man when God said “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth” –(Genesis 1:26)

Faith is very crucial in the life of the Christian believer for the following reasons:

1) As Christian Believers, We Live By Faith
Romans 1:17 says “For therein is the righteousness of God revealed from faith to faith: as it is written: the just shall live by faith”.

Also in Galatians 2:20 Apostle Paul tells us that “I am crucified with Christ, nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me”.

Our relationship with God through Jesus Christ, His Son, has been made right. God declared us to be righteous because of our faith in Christ “from faith to faith”
By faithfully trusting in God by our belief in Christ, we are saved and find life not only in this world but eternally.

2) As Christian Believers, We Are Firm In The Faith
Romans 11:20 says “Well; because of unbelief they were broken off, and thou standest by faith. Be not high minded but fear”.
2 Corinthians 1:24 puts it thus, “Not for that we have dominion over your faith, but are helpers of your joy, for by faith ye stand”.

Due to faithlessness, the Jews who are the natural branches of the tree were broken off. The Gentile believers have been grafted into the tree like a wild olive shoot. Both the Jews and Gentiles now share the tree’s nourishment based on faith in God. No one can rest on heritage or culture for salvation. The Gentiles should not feel superior to the Jews because if God had not rejected the Jews, as it were, the Gentiles probably would not have had a chance.

3) As Christian Believers, We Combat The Good Fight
1 Timothy 6:12 says “Fight the good fight of faith, lay hold on eternal life, whereunto thou art also called and has professed good profession before many witnesses”.

As Christian believers, we must have an active faith, obeying God with courage and doing what we know is right.
It is time for action on your part. What are you waiting for? – Get going, don’t wait!

4) As Christian Believers, We Walk By Faith
2 Corinthians 5:7 says “For we walk by Faith, not by sight”.

5) As Christian Believers, We Win By Faith
In 1 John 5:4 where we took our text, we are told that we can overcome whatever challenge life throws on our way, as long as we have faith and trust in God.
It says “For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith”.

6) As Christian Believers, We Are Justified By Faith
Romans 5:1 puts it thus, “Therefore, being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ”.

Peace with God means that we have been reconciled with Him. There is no more hostility between us and God, no sin blocking our relationship with Him. Peace with God is made possible by Jesus paying the price for our sins through His death on the cross.

7) As Christian Believers, We Please God By Faith
Hebrews 11:6 tells us that “But without faith it is impossible to please Him; for he that cometh to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him”.

God wants us to have a personal dynamic relationship with Him, and not just a mere knowledge of His existence. After all the demons and witches know that God exists, that does not stop them from doing evil. Those who seek Him diligently will find that they have intimate relationship with Him. When you tell others about the gospel, please encourage them to be honest and diligent in their search for truth and faith in God.

8) As Christians Believers, We Grow In Faith
1 Thessalonian 1:3 says “Remembering without ceasing your work of faith, and labour of love, and patience of hope in our Lord Jesus Christ, in the sight of God, and our Father”.

Like the Thessalonians who stood firm in the face of persecution, Apostle Paul is admonishing us to also do the work of God produced by faith, labour prompted by love, and endurance inspired by hope. These characteristics are the hall marks of an effective Christian believer.

9) As Christian Believers. We Die In Faith
“These all died in faith, not having received the promise, but having seen them afar off, and were persuaded of them, and embraced them, and confessed that they were strangers, and pilgrims on the earth” (Hebrews 11:13).

This world is not our home and cannot live here forever. Many people, especially of the Old Testament, died without receiving all that God promised. However, a good number of them never lost their vision of heaven.
Many of us become frustrated, and defeated when our needs, wants or expectations, are not immediately met on giving our lives to Christ, and therefore want to quit. If you are one of such people, please be patient, take courage from heroes of faith who lived and died without seeing the fruit of their faith on earth and yet, continued to believe (Hebrews 11:36-39).

Some Heroes of Faith Who Did Not See The Fruit Of Their Faith On Earth
Abel and Enoch (Hebrews 11:4-5)
Noah and Abraham (Hebrews 11:7-8)
Sarah and Isaac (Hebrews 11:11, 20)
Jacob and Joseph (Hebrews 11:21-22)
Moses and Rahab (Hebrews 11:23,31)
Boaz (Ruth 2:15-16)

Some Heroes of Faith Who Persevered And Saw The Fruit Of Faith

Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, David, Samuel, the Prophets (Hebrews 11:32-33)

How To Grow In Faith Through Jesus Christ
“That we henceforth be no children, tossed to and fro , and caused about with every wind of doctrine, by the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive” (Ephesians 4:14).
1) Growing In Faith Begins With The New Birth Through The Word Of God
1 Peter 2:2 says “As new born babes, desire the sincere milk of the word, that ye may grow thereby”.

One thing common to all children is that they want to grow up – like their big brothers and sisters or their parents. Similarly, when we are born again, we become spiritual new babies, if healthy, we will yearn to grow. The need for milk is a natural instinct for a baby, and it signals the desire for nourishment that will lead to growth. In the same way, since we see the need for God’s word and begin to find nourishment with Christ, our spiritual appetite will increase and we will start to mature. How strong is your desire for God’s word?

2) As Children, We are Fed With Milk
“For everyone that useth milk is unskillful in the word of righteousness: for he is a babe” (Hebrews 5:13)

Commitment to Christ moves people out of their comfort zones or positions. You cannot grow as a Christian if you remain in the same position instead of applying what you have learned to your situation and teaching others. As a new born Christian, stop your old ways of doing things, fellowship with the brethren and imbibe the new culture in Christ. In this way, you will be able to understand the high-priestly role of Christ.

3) As Adults, We Are Fed With Solid Food
“But strong meat belongeth to them that are of full age, even those by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil” (Hebrews 5:14).

Your spiritual growth determines your capacity to feast on deeper knowledge of God (solid food). More often than not, we want God;s banquet before we are spiritually capable of digesting it. As we grow in the Lord and put into practice what we have learned, our capacity to understand will also grow.

4) Many Remain Eternal Christians
Hebrews 5:12-14 tells us “Wherefore lift up the hands which hang down and the feeble knees; And make straight paths for your feet, lest that which is lame be turned out of the way, but let it rather be healed. Follow peace with all men and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord”.

In order for us to grow from baby Christians to adult or mature Christians, we must learn discernment. We must train our consciences, minds, senses and our bodies to distinguish between good and evil. Can you recognise temptation before you? Can you tell the difference between correct text of Scripture and a mistaken one?

5) We Should All Grow And Become Adults
Ephesians 4:13-14 admonishes us to walk in unity.
Working together, the church can express the fullness of Christ – Ephesians 3:19
Christ is the Truth – John 14:6
The Holy Spirit who guides the church is the Spirit of Truth – John 16:13
Satan, by contrast, is the father of lies – John 8:44

As followers of Christ, we must be committed to the truth. This means that our words should be honest and our actions should reflect Christ’s integrity as well. We should realise that speaking the truth in love is not always easy, convenient or pleasant. However, this is very necessary if the church is going to do Christ’s work on earth. Remember that YOU are the church.

6) The Lord Looks After Our Growth
Ephesians 4:11-13 says “And He gave some Apostles, and some Prophets, and some Evangelists, and some Pastors, and some Teachers. For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ: Till we all come in the unity of faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, unto a perfect man, unto the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ”.

The Holy Spirit has given every Christian a special gift for building up the church. Now that we have these gifts, it is imperative we use them. If you know what your gifts are, please look fo opportunity to serve the Lord and use them. If you do not know, ask God to show you, perhaps with the help of your Pastor or other Christian friends. The enormous responsibility the church has includes preaching, teaching, evangelising, healing, giving, nurturing, administering, building, etc. God has called us as members of His body to perform this responsibility. Together we can obey God more fully than anyone alone. Working together, in unity, the church can express the fullness of Christ (Ephesians 3:19).

7) The Word Is The Best Way Of Generating Our Growth In Faith
Acts 20:32 puts it this way “And now, brethren, I commend you to God, and to the Word of His grace, which is able to build you up, and to give you an inheritance among all them which are sanctified”.

Like he prayed for the Ephesians in this passage, Apostle Paul is also praying for and commending you and I to God and His Word that the more we know Christ (our model), through the word, the more we will be like Christ. Study Jesus in the Gospel to see what He was like on earth. Personal knowledge of Christ through the Word will greatly change our lives. How much of His Word do you know? How much of Him are you willing to learn?

Until you invite Jesus Christ into your life (being born again) God’s continued presence can never abide with you. Today, accept Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Saviour. Ask Him to have mercy on you and forgive your sins and become the Master and Ruler of your soul, henceforth.
If you have backslid, retrace your steps back to Him right now and rededicate your life to God. However, if you have a living relationship with God, then tell others about Him – how much He loves us, He is our Savior, Redeemer and He died for our sins in order that we might not have to face the punishment that we rightly deserve. He is coming back the second time to take with Him all those who believe and accept Him, by faith, into their lives to live with Him eternally.
Congratulations if you have just accepted Jesus Christ into your life. Now look for a Bible believing church in your neighborhood to attend and you will be taught and grow in the Word of God.

God Bless You.       

#PathofLife

Changing the Culture of the Spheres of Influence through the Beatitudes

Changing the Culture of the Spheres of Influence through the Beatitudes y Lilian Schmid – Strategist and Prayer Coordinator for The Prayer Strategy Spheres of Influence International 

Introduction

How can we use Jesus’ Command to “love one another” (John 13:33-34) change the 21st century culture which is affected by sin: every sphere of influence in our society has been corrupted and affected by the ungodly activities which are operating to destroy humanity. Modern life has become multi-faceted and hectic with the following spheres/domains dominating and competing for ours and our families’ time, money, affections and ambitions. These spheres or domains are:

  • Business and Finance
  • Government and the Military
  • Law and Justice
  • Faith and Philosophy
  • Creative Arts
  • Education
  • Charity and Not for Profit Welfare
  • Health and Science
  • Media and Entertainment
  • Sport and Recreation

In the Old Testament God promised to mend that which had been lost in the Fall by reinstituting peace on earth. Through Ezekiel, the Lord looked forward to such restoration for his people:

“And I will make a covenant of peace with them, an everlasting covenant. I will give them their land and multiply them, and I will put my Temple among them forever. I will make my home among them. I will be their God, and they will be my people.” (Ezek 37:26-27).

Peace will come by God’s effort. The result will be material blessing and, most importantly, a mended relationship between people and God. The prophet Isaiah brought a message similar to that of Ezekiel: How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of the messenger who announces peace, who brings good news, who announces salvation, who says to Zion, “Your God reigns” (Isa 52:7).  God’s peace is integrally related to his salvation, to the restoration of his reign on earth. When God saves, he will restore his kingdom so that those who live under his rightful rule will experience the fullness of his peace.

Jesus entered the world as the one who would fulfil the mission of the Suffering Servant, thus bringing divine peace. Even before Jesus was born, one of his relatives proclaimed what God was about to do: “By the tender mercy of our God, the dawn from on high will break upon us, to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the way of peace” (Luke 1:78-79)

How the Beatitudes will Bring Change to the Spheres of Influence in Our Society

“The beatitudes reveal to us eight qualities that bring God’s blessing: meekness and mercy, poorness in spirit and purity of heart, mourning and hunger, peacemaking and persecution. Jesus highlighted these to offer both encouragement and instruction on living distinctly as his followers in a world with values much different from God’s. As we study these qualities and integrate them into our lives, we will receive the blessing Jesus promised to his followers then and now”.
(The Beatitudes: Developing Spiritual Character by John R.W. Stott)

Looking at the Beatitudes as a kind of ladder, an ascent, we can discover some amazing things about spirituality and its fundamental relationship to the world. The Beatitudes have intense significance in a world where many Christians want to change others and the world from the top down, through forced conformity rather than genuine conversion. The Beatitudes are the essence, the lifeblood and beating heart of authentic, ancient and living Christianity. They are (from Mt 5:3-10):

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are they who mourn, for they shall be comforted.

Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.

Blessed are they who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.

Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.

Blessed are the pure of heart, for they shall see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called children of God.

Blessed are they who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

The Beatitudes express the idea that peace comes from peacemakers who are characterised by their poverty of spirit, their ability to mourn for the world, their lack of attachments or clinging to personal rights, their hunger for the healing of the world, their extreme mercy extended even towards their worst enemies, and their purity of heart. Peacemakers, according to Christ, are the instruments who bring peace to the world because they exemplify these characteristics. Change comes from the inside and moves towards the external. Peacemakers are persecuted because they present a challenge to authority which compels from the outside but cannot penetrate the interior.

Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount begins by talking about the kingdom of heaven. A kingdom has a king, subjects, a place, and the ways of the king and his kingdom. It is where this particular king is reigning. So when Jesus teaches, He is not just advocating rules or giving advice. He is talking about a place or, more accurately, a realm where the ruler is God. And what is God’s kingdom like? What is God like as a king? Who are His subjects? And what are the ways of God? You can see that Jesus speaks about all these things in the Beatitudes. We learn about who the subjects of this kingdom are: the poor in spirit, those who mourn, etc. The true King of this universe is the One who gives the kingdom, who comforts, gives the earth to His children, and so on. Jesus is telling them about the wonder and goodness of living under the reign of God. The creator of this universe is the king of every sphere of influence, Jesus is the author of these spheres and we are the witnesses to bring real changes into them by proclaiming God’s kingdom on each one of them.

How the Kingdom will manifest its Power in the Spheres

First of all Jesus is speaking about the kingdom as a present and future reality. We can truly possess the kingdom of heaven here and now on the earth. We can enjoy the truth of this at least to some extent. The people of the kingdom are blessed. The word “blessed” always implies that the one doing the blessing is God. To be blessed is to be favoured or honoured by God. “Blessed” is a passive term. The one who is blessed is receiving from God His notice and favour. We can bring blessing to others that we meet within our sphere of influence.

So who are those who are blessed in the kingdom of heaven? And why are they blessed? In looking over the Beatitudes, we are immediately struck that Jesus is saying the unexpected, to say the least! The qualities of the blessed on Jesus’ teaching are not at all what we think of when we consider those we believe to be blessed.

To be blessed is to have value as human beings from our (Government), to have good health (Health and Science), to be secure and protected (Law and Justice), have great success in one’s endeavours (Business), creative and artistic (Arts), athletic (Sport and Recreation), freedom of speech and ideas (Faith and Philosophy), rich in Knowledge (Education), helping others in need to live (Charity and Not For Profit Welfare), spreading Christian values through technology (Media). These are the qualities we tend to associate with being blessed.

Jesus brings a new dimension to human life through the Sermon on the Mount. In the Beatitudes he teaches us the quality of life that we are hungry for. Every sphere of influence needs these kingdom qualities to be proclaimed in them. The qualities He includes are actually what we would normally consider indications of someone not being blessed! The person who we naturally think is blessed is favoured to have the kingdom of heaven now and a future fullness in comfort, inheritance, satisfaction, mercy, etc. The blessing then that these people receive is not to be poor in spirit, mourning, or meek. Rather, the presence of these qualities is thought to be a sign that the person is not cursed, but actually blessed. Paradoxically in Jesus teaching one can be called blessed when they are poor in spirit because being poor in spirit is a sign that she/he is looking for the very thing God the King is giving: His kingdom. You can see that there is a connection in the message of Jesus between the person who is blessed and why they are blessed, where every person who is a witness to Christ in the Marketplace can bring a blessing to these domains or spheres.

God our King desires indeed to bless us, to bless our families, our church, our work. Through our mission we can transform our society by applying the teaching of the Beatitudes through each one of us. We can be a part of bringing the reality of the kingdom of God on earth as it is in heaven. To understand that to be blessed here and now is to find we are being made ready to receive all these things forever.

Jesus is telling us about His kingdom. We see that God greatly desires to bless His people in a full and complete way. God is not going to give sparingly – just some comfort, or a small inheritance. And what God is doing in His people now, when He is blessing them, is that He is making them able more and more to hope in, receive, long for, the very riches He is giving. If we are in Christ we are a new creation: “Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” (2 Co 5:17).

So as blessed people:

  • Let us be rich in God’s Kingdom who is the provider of all richness in this wor Colossians 3:16
  • Let us be comforted to be free, Jesus gave us freedom the moment he gave his life on the cross. Galatians 3:1-14
  • Let us inherit the earth because we are sons and daughter of God’s Kingdom. Psalm 2:7
  • Let us be righteous and let God’s light shine through us. Matthew 5:14
  • Let us receive mercy and grace, and be merciful to others Matthew 8:14-17
  • Let us have Jesus’ heart and receive His unconditional love to love others as He loved us. John 3:16
  • Let us be peacemakers and bring unity across the body. John 13:35
  • Let us handle persecution with perseverance; then we may understand the fullness of God’s mercy and grace. John 25:20

Amen.

King of Kings

Success. Depending on who you ask, success means different things. To most people success means money or fame. To me success is reading the bible from cover to cover. I want to be spiritually wise and really know God. I want to uncover all the lies within the world. I want to know the truth. I know I’m a sinner however, I will try not to sin as much as I can. The world is full of sinful things. Music, Celebrities, Books, etc. I may only be 13 years old (almost 14 on July 23) but I will never understand atheists. Satan shows himself out in the open in today’s society, you can either choose to accept it and try to escape it or ignore it and be blinded by wickedness. 

Death. Most people are afraid of death, you see, the christian man should not fear death. If you really believed and cared for Christ, you would know that he has created the heavens for us followers of Christ. On Judgement Day, you either make it to heaven or you don’t. It’s that simple. Jesus will judge on the day of Judgement, It’s his duty after all, he is the one who died for all of our sins. Although he will be judging(John 5:22), he would not be the reason if you go to Hell. God gave us all a choice. Nomatter where you come from or where you live, God gave us two options. Believe Jesus Christ died for our sins or perish in the eternal flames of Hell (Deuteronomy 30:15-20). Knowing this I now laugh in the face of death, I will never fear death and to be honest, I don’t care if I die, I know I will be united with Christ for eternity.

My Future. As a Christian I want to pursue my dreams while being able to still follow Christ. Maybe when I get older I can be a Pastor. The last thing I want to do is depart from Christ. I would give up everything before I flee from Christ. I, however, am still a normal kid, and I have a lot to learn. When I grow old and it’s time for me to retire, I pray that I will have enough to support myself and my family. I don’t need much. I want to own a ranch in a rural area. I will teach my kids about Jesus, and make sure they feel comfortable talking to me. Teenagers often get pressured to do sinful activities. I will teach my kids to be modest and grateful for whatever they get. Being a Christian means to be Christ-Like. Now I know it’s impossible to be as great as Jesus, however you can choose not to willingly sin. All I ask of my kids is to have faith in Jesus and follow the Ten-Commandments. There’s even a chance that this won’t happen, Jesus might come back before I get old to take all believers, and defeat Satan once and for all. Doing so will end his reign of terror and end sin!

Following Christ. Would you rather take a long and bumpy road to glory or a short and easy road to damnation. The funny thing is, once you turn to Jesus, you realize how horrible the world is. Puppets of Satan WILL try to throw you off track. In these times, you must pray. Jesus hears all prayers and is willing to help. The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. Pray before you fall too deep into sin. If you follow the short road to damnation, to you sin will be normal and the world seems perfect. Until Death. God laughs at those who mock him. When a sinner who doesn’t follow Christ dies they will suffer forever, there’s no smooth-talking out of it. The question everyone needs to be asking is “Are you in the will of God?” Will Jesus say “Depart from me, I never knew you” or will he welcome you with open arms into the Kingdom of Heaven.

Some may be asking “How can I make sure that I am a follower of Christ and make it to Heaven?” This question is fairly easy to answer. There are only two steps to make sure Jesus knows you. The first step is to ACTUALLY believe with all of your heart that Jesus is King and he died for our sins. The last and harder step is to keep the Ten-Commandments. That’s it. Remember, God wouldn’t do anything to hurt you and everything you do in his name will make your life better. Jesus I pray that whoever reads this, even if I don’t publish this, will get their eyes opened and the holy spirit will enter them, I hope reading this might make them a real child of God.

In Christ Everything Is Brand New

“Therefore, if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away, behold all things are become new” (2 Corinthians 5:17)

When you give your life to Jesus Christ or genuinely accept Him as your personal Lord, Savior, Master and Ruler of your soul (being born again), you will pleasantly experience certain changes in your life which makes you a new creature and gives you a brand new beginning. We shall discuss some of these changes that you will experience in this message.

1) You Now Walk In A New Way
“By a new and living way, which He hath consecrated for us, through the veil, that is to say, His flesh” (Hebrews 10:20)
By the death of Jesus Christ, the veil that hindered access to the Most High Place in the temple was removed. You now have direct access and can walk into God’s presence at any time. You no longer need an intermediary or High Priest or Pastor to intercede on your behalf.

2) You Are Now In A New Covenant With God
“For finding fault with them, He saith, Behold the days come, saith the Lord, when I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel and with the house of Judah” (Hebrews 8:8).

Have you entered into this covenant? Have you begun walking in a new and better way?

3) You Are Now A New Creature
According to 2 Corinthians 5:17, which is our text for this message, when you are born-again, you become brand new on the inside. The Holy Spirit gives you a new life and you are not the same any more. Please note that you are not re-educated or remodelled or rehabilitated or reformed. You are totally re-created (a new creation), living in vital union with Christ, according to Colossian 2:6-7.
At conversion, we are not merely turning a new leaf, but we are beginning a new life in new hope under a new Master, Jesus.

4) You Have A Brand New Name
“He that hath an ear let him hear what the spirit saith unto the churches; To him that overcometh will I give to eat, of the hidden manner, and will give him white stone, and in the stone, a new name written, which no man knoweth, saving he that recieveth it” (Revelation 2:17).
The name of every believer will be written on each stone as evidence that he/she has truly given their life to Christ and worthy to be declared worthy to receive eternal life. God will give us new names and new hearts. Are you ready to receive yours?

Also Revelation 3:12 says that “Him that overcometh will I make a pillar in the Temple of my God, and he shall go no more out, and I will write upon him the name of my God, and the name of the City of my God, which is New Jerusalem, which cometh down out of heaven from my God: and I will write upon him my new name”
Revelation 3:12 is telling us that the New Jerusalem is the future dwelling of the people of God. This means that we will have a new citizenship in God’s future kingdom, where everything will be new, pure and secure. Won’t you rather have a new Name in God’s future kingdom where everything is pure, new and safe?

5) You Will Receive A New Commandment
“A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another, as I have loved you, that ye also love one another” (John 13:34).

We are commanded to love one another based on Jesus’ sacrificial love for us. It is only such love that will win souls for Christ and keep us Christians united. We are expected to be living examples of Jesus’ love just as He was the living example of God’s love. Do people know that you are a follower of Jesus by your love for others?

6) You Find New Mercies Every Morning
“It is of the LORD’s mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness” (Lamentations 3:22-23).

God’ mercy is always available to His children because His steadfast love and mercy are greater than any sin. God promises us His forgiveness. When you trust in God’s faithfulness day by day, gives you confidence in His great promise for the future.
Are you positioned for God’s mercies which are new every morning?

7) You Will Have A New Heaven For The Whole Eternity
“And I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth were passed away; and there was no more sea” (Revelation 21:1).

God has promised that He would create a new earth which is eternal (Isaiah 65:17, 66:22). What we don’t know is where the new earth would be or what it would look like. However, God and His children (those whose names are written in the Book of Life), the overcomers, will be united to live in the new earth together forever.
I will be one of them………hope to see you there!!

8) You Will Experience A New Birth
“Jesus answered and said unto him, (Nichodemus), Verily, verily, I unto thee, Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God” (John 3:3).

The Kingdom of God is a personal experience. It is not ethnic or national. The entrance requirements are ONLY found in Jesus. These include Repentance and New Birth (Rebirth). This, you will have when you are born again.
You can only enter the kingdom of God by being spiritually reborn.

9) You Will Receive New Life
“Therefore we are buried with Him by baptism into death; that as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life” (Romans 6:4).
.The water baptism you receive when you give your life to Jesus symbolises the death and burial of the old way of life you had before giving your life to Jesus. Coming out of or being raised from the water symbolises resurrection to New Life with Christ.
With your old sinful life dead and buried, you can resist sin and begin to enjoy your wonderful new life with Christ.

10) You Now Have a New Heart
“And I will give them one heart, and I will put a new spirit within you; and I will take the stony heart out of their flesh, and will give them an heart of flesh” (Ezekiel 11:19).
By “one heart”, it means a singleness of purpose – the One and Only True God, no more other gods. We must turn from our sins and the Holy Spirit will enable our new life. God will then give us new purposes, motives and guidelines as we enjoy our wonderful new heart.
Have you received your new heart yet?

11) You Have A New Spirit
“And I will put my spirit within you, and cause you to walk in my statutes, and ye shall keep my judgements, and do them” (Ezekiel 36:27)
No matter how impure our life is right now, God promises you a new or fresh start. Jesus can wash away your sins and give you a new heart for God to have His Spirit within you.
Why would you want to continue to patch up your old life when you could have a brand new life?

12) You Will Be A Completely New Person
“For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day” (2 Corinthians 4:16).
Apostle Paul did not give up in the face of persecution. Instead, he concentrated in experiencing the inner strength from the Holy Spirit (Eph 3:16, Col 3:10). You also should not allow anything to force you to quit. Rather renew your commitment to serve the Lord. Never allow the intensity of today’s pain force you to forsake your eternal reward. Your very weakness allows the resurrection power of Christ to strengthen you moment by moment.

13) You Will Sing A New Song Joyfully
“And they sung a new song saying, Thou art worthy to take the book, and to open the seals thereof; for thou was slain, and hast redeemed us to God by thy blood out of every kindred, and tongue, and people, and nation” (Revelation 5:9).
Psalm 40:3 also says “And He hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the LORD”.
It is not easy to wait for God’s help, but when you do, the benefits are usually more than the waiting. For example David received the following benefits for waiting on the LORD:
              a) He was lifted out of his despair
              b) God sets David’s feet on the rock
              c) God gave him a firm place to stand
              d) God put a new song of praise in the mouth of David

More often than not, blessings are not received unless we go through the trial of waiting
We always need to praise God for what He has already done in our lives, what He is currently doing in our lives and praise Him in advance of what He is yet to do for us. In this way, He will do more for us with a joyful song in our mouth.

14) You Will Live In New City
“And I John saw the Holy City, New Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a great voice out of heaven saying Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and He will dwell with them; and they shall be His people, and God Himself shall be with them, and He, their God. And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more deaths, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away” (Revelation 21:2-4).

New Jerusalem is the New City where God lives with His people. Where He lives, there is joy, peace, security and love. It is described as a place where God will wipe away tears “from their eyes”. There will be no more deaths, sorrow, crying or pain forever. What a wonderful truth and place to be!
We may not know as much as we would like to, one thing is so sure that eternity with God would be more wonderful than we could ever imagine. Where else would you rather be?

Until you have Jesus Christ in your life (being born again) God’s continued presence can never abide with you. Today, accept Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Saviour. Ask Him to forgive your sins and become the Master and Ruler of your soul henceforth. If you have backslid, retrace your steps back to Him right now and rededicate your life to God. However, if you have a living relationship with God, then tell others about Him – How everything concerning their lives will become new with wonderful lives in Christ. Congratulations if you have just accepted Jesus Christ into your life. Now look for a Bible believing church in your neighborhood to attend and grow in the Word of God.

 

God Bless You

#PathofLife

Why do we not receive when we ask despite the assurance in Matthew 7:7?

I want to take you through the scripture in Matthew 7:7-11 but before then, I want you to take note of the previous chapters, chapter 5 and 6. In Chapter 5 Jesus taught the crowd what is known as ‘the beatitudes’ how to live right or the right attitude of a child of God. What I call Jesus’ way.

Right after he established his teachings from chapter 5 through chapter 6 and in verse 7 of chapter 7 he said “Ask, and it will be given to you, search, and you will find, knock, and the door will be opened for you.
The question is “why did Jesus take them through those teachings of beatitudes before telling them to ask, search and knock? Because it’s assumed that they must have gotten the lesson “we must have learnt the lesson and now we can ask right”. But it’s unfortunate that wasn’t the case, we don’t just care about the lesson we want results. One of the reasons people go after miracles, signs and wonders today. They don’t want to know about God and they care less about building a relationship with God either. Just jump and grab!

Not because you have been given the privilege to ask so you ask the head of John the Baptist… you ask for the life of your neighbour whom you regard as an enemy or you go to God with a list of your wants with an expectation to receive from God, I’m sorry there’s nothing for you!
On the ground of that privilege given to us to ask, we are expected to ask in accordance with the Will of God for us which was the reason for the teachings of our Lord Jesus Christ that we may know the Will of God for us and His precept.

In verse 9 and 10, Jesus gave practical examples of the things we can ask for among others. “9 Is there anyone among you who, if your child asks for bread, will give a stone? Food is essential and that is why God hasn’t for once failed to provide food for His children even in the wilderness, even when we fail to ask He knows we are in need of food.
In verse “10 Or if the child asks for a fish, will give a snake?” God knows all that we need and has not failed to provide for us. The case is that some of us don’t know the difference between need and want so it feels like God does not honour His Word. His Word is forever settled in heaven and will always accomplish the purpose of which it was sent.

When we fail to learn the lesson and ask wrongly, it’s entirely our fault and not God’s fault. If you bring charges against God you will be in the wrong… Jeremiah 12:1. Because God is a righteous God!!! When we learn to live right with one another, forgive those who offend us…Our heavenly father will never deny us anything good. Amen!